cheers

his name is Mario..he told me he loved me,and I believed him...but he did not mean it...he couldn't have...he says he did...but the way he treats me...I must be trash...he used to treat me like...well...it was amazing...I was very much so in love..I loved himmore than anything else in the world. I was his completely..he had all of me...every single thing....I was never good enough..he wanted more...

his life is falling apart...so I guess I must be to blame?as ifmyown life hasn't beenfalling to pieces slowly over the years...I must go through even more heartbreak....and this seems to be the worst of it all.

I really love this person...I would do anything for him...but I must not be good enough to get that in return...

I don't know what I feel right now...but I know I'm thinking bad thoughts....I know what I'm thinking about doing...but I don't even care anymore...I've only been putting it off hoping that my life would amount to something more..

I thought that this person that I loved was going to play a great part in my life...and I wanted him to..

but he had other plans..

I told him that I hate him..I'm so angry and hurt that I believe it is true...but I can't stop the tears from coming down my face because I know how much I loved him..

Does love mean nothin anymore? is it something that can be played around with...what do those words mean to people?

I have a bottle of vodka sitting next to me and it's only 8 in the morning...

I lost him...

he left..

and now I hate him..